Chapter 16 is about wordy sentences. How do you know if its too wordy? Try taking out words you may not need and if the sentence still has the same meaning and is understanding, then you previously had a wordy sentence. Repeating words over again in a sentence can make it word, and redundancies. Words and phrases you should try to avoid are is, are, was, there is, there are, etc. and phrases like "I think that..", "It seems that...", etc.
The reason I chose to write about this chapter is because I tend to make my sentences too wordy. I always find myself repeating words just so I can fill up space or because at the time I thought it sounded smarter. But now looking back, it doesn't sound smarter and half the time it makes no sense. Avoiding using words like are, is was, there is..and etc, is really hard. I've tried it once as an assignment in high school to edit an essay we had to write and get rid of those types of words and I found it impossible. It's not impossible though, you just have to think about it really well to figure it out. I also tend to use the phrases "I think that..." and so on. I never found anything wrong with them but after reading this chapter I guess I need to stop using them..
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Smoke Signals: Victor and Thomas' Relationship
Victor and Thomas' relationship reminds me of my boyfriend and his nephew. My boyfriend is mean to his little nephew because he is older, just like Victor is mean to Thomas. Victor is Thomas' role model and he looks up to him. You can tell Victor is trying to help him just like he is trying to teach him to be a good indian and what they look like.
I do understand why Victor and Thomas have their disagreements. Thomas is thankful for Arnold because he saved him from the fire, but Victor doesn't like his father because he left them and was violent. For awhile they have their differences and I think it's because of how Arnold helped Thomas but then left Victor. Thomas and Victor both care a lot for eachother even though Victor doesn't act like it for awhile. But it was all worth it in the end, because they couldn't be closer.
I do understand why Victor and Thomas have their disagreements. Thomas is thankful for Arnold because he saved him from the fire, but Victor doesn't like his father because he left them and was violent. For awhile they have their differences and I think it's because of how Arnold helped Thomas but then left Victor. Thomas and Victor both care a lot for eachother even though Victor doesn't act like it for awhile. But it was all worth it in the end, because they couldn't be closer.
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Rules for Writers Chaper 48
In chapter 48, it talks about evaluating arguments and distinguishing between reasonable or fallacious. Generalizations are used in arguments all the time but aren't always accurate. Some of the fallacies used in arguments are called hasty generalizations where someone only uses one source of data and there are stereotypes where people see what they want to see instead of knowing the real facts. Usually writers use ways to persuade the reader but sometimes its too emotional. Its good to put yourself in the opposing viewpoint. No matter what, the arguments should be supported by accurate information.
I have never put myself in the opposing viewpoint but I do think it will be helpful. Usually is something sounds good to me and makes sense to me, I tend to think of it as accurate even if it may not be. Now, I will probably read over everything and make sure I don't miss the real accurate information instead of sticking to what sounds good.
I have never put myself in the opposing viewpoint but I do think it will be helpful. Usually is something sounds good to me and makes sense to me, I tend to think of it as accurate even if it may not be. Now, I will probably read over everything and make sure I don't miss the real accurate information instead of sticking to what sounds good.
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Essay 2
We have read a few stories that all have to do with how family can shape an individual in many ways. Not only can family shape a person by culture, the ways their parents do things, or anything else that could possibly help shape a person, but even a connection with your family; a bond where you spend time together and do things as a family.
In the story Shooting Dad by Sarah Vowell, the narrator is telling the reader about her experience with her dad. She grew up with her parents not really caring about what she did, so it wasn’t a big deal she didn’t like hunting and shooting things with her. Once she got older and realized how much her father’s hobby meant to him, instead of pushing herself away from her father and doing her own thing, she watched her dad and helped out. I think that her family shaped her identity but showing that it’s alright if someone doesn’t enjoy doing certain things family members might like, but it’s also important to realize how much that activity or event might mean to the person. You can learn so much from your family and the people involved in your life.
Shooting Dad and Coming Home Again have some similarities that stick out to me. Both stories evolve around a single event. In Shooting Dad, the story is about a father and his guns. His daughter doesn’t understand why guns are so cool to her father and her twin sister, but all she knows is she doesn’t like them. Towards the end of the story, it tells how she soon realizes she needs to figure out the gun ordeal. The story doesn’t say this but I feel like she wants to figure the gun ordeal out because she wants to become closer to her father and knowing her dad played a part in shaping who she is. So, she goes and watches her dad shoot the cannon and says that when her father dies, “I will have my father’s body burned into ashes. I will pack these ashes into paper bags. I will go to the mountains with my mother, sister, and the cannon. I will plunge his remains into the barrel and point it into a hill so that he doesn’t take anyone with him. I will light the fuse. But I will cover my ears. Because when I blow what used to be my dad into the earth, I want it to hurt” (Pg. 23 in reader). Even though her and her father didn’t always see eye to eye and had completely different opinions on everything, her dad had an impact on her and because her dad seems like he meant a lot to her, she will shoot the cannon when the times comes, for her dad.
In Coming Home Again by Chang-rae Lee, the family is evolved around cooking. The narrator tells a story about his mom’s cooking and how he wanted to grow up and be like her. He got sent away when he was young, because his mother wanted him to get the best education possible. Towards the end of the story, it seems to me like the mom regrets sending her son away for so long when that time could’ve been used and time spent together. When his parents would come visit him, his mother was always a little weird but what brought them together and closer was that she always brought him a meal she had cooked, which brought happiness to everyone. His mother became sick, sick to the point where she couldn’t eat and could only take a little taste of what was being cooked. Her son knew that cooking was his mother’s passion and he loved that and wanted to take it on.
The significance of the themes of these two stories is that family is important. The things people learn from family, time spent together, and bonding with them whether or not you want to, is important. Family plays a big role in most people’s life. It determines the way that person is later in life and explains why they do the things they do.
I personally can relate to Shooting Dad. With my dad, I would always follow the things he liked to do when I was younger. I played almost every sport because he made me think it was cool. Once I got older, I started not wanting to play these sports anymore, except I stuck with soccer. Soccer was huge for me and I would get so many awards. As high school went on, I got to senior year and just didn’t feel like playing anymore. My parents were really disappointed which brought us to arguing. My dad and I aren’t very good at talking about things and communicating, so we always avoid it. That led me to stop doing things with the family like going canoeing on the weekends and bike rides which was what my parents and sister did all the time. I chose not to.
On July 30, 2010, I got home and no one was home. I called my mom and all she said was “Dad is on his way to the hospital! Meet us there and I’ll explain.” I don’t think I had ever realized how important my family was to me and how much I regretted doing my own thing without them for so long. My family had been on a bike ride when my dad looked back for my sister and his wheel turned and he landed directly on his hip. After hours in the hospital, we found out my dad needed an emergency hip replacement. My dad will probably never be able to do a lot of things with us like he used. He still has trouble walking and bending his knee and it’s been about 3 months since he had surgery. Ever since then, I’ve been trying to figure out why I never would do anything with my family or take any trip with them camping all summer or the summer before. Now I know that once my dad is able to ride his bike again and go canoeing, I’ll be doing it with them. His accident made me realize how I needed to be a better daughter and do more things with my family instead of pushing myself away from them.
I feel like I relate to the narrator in Shooting Dad because she didn’t like the hobbies her dad did. She and her dad were completely different, just like my dad and I. Once she got older she realized how important hunting and shooting was to her dad and that made her go out with him to do the things he liked to do. It makes me upset that it took my dad’s accident for me to realize how important doing those things together is to my dad. I am grateful though that I did finally realize it and once he’s fully better, I can start doing more things with him.
Family is important and I don’t know how some people can get by and be fine without it. I know that my family has made a big impact on my life and has helped shape who I am and I know the people in these stories feel the same way. Whether it’s cooking, doing activities together, going canoeing, bike riding together; it doesn’t matter what it is. Doing things with your family or having something that brings you together and relate with each other; that’s what’s important.
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Rules for Writers Chapter 4
Chapter 4 talks about building effective paragraphs. First, you want to focus on the main point. You'll need to state the main point in your topic sentence so readers of the paper know what they're reading about. Throughout the paper, its important to stick with the point of the paper instead of going on about somethings your topic has nothing to do with. To develop your main point and make it stick out, you need to write more then a few sentences; maybe give a little back round information. There many parts to a paper so it needs to be organized in paragraphs. Some things to maybe include are some examples to support, description, comparing/contrasting something to your topic, narration (something that might have to do with flashbacks), cause and effect, classification, and definition. Make sure that your ideas are linked to each other.
Sometimes its important to repeat some key words in different forms. The book uses the example (hike, hiker, hiking). You also need to be consistent. You don't want to change the point of the view from one to another or the verb tense from something other then your draft used. Using transitions helps readers move from sentence to sentence (using worlds like for example, next, thirdly, etc.).
Once your paper is finished you should go through and adjust your paragraph length. Make sure they aren't too long or too short. Paragraphs that are too long can make the reader get lost and lose interest in the writing.
When writing my papers, once thing I never do it go back and adjust my paragraph lengths. I usually just keep them the way they are and add more if it needs to be a certain page length but otherwise I don't usually mess with it. I think after reading chapter 4, I will start going back and adjusting my paragraphs to make sure they are just right and where they need to be. I also have a hard time including examples and experiences in my work sometimes. I either forget, or just can't think of something to use and so even when it was required to include those, I would usually just leave them out which resulting in a lower grade. Chapter 4 has a lot of great information and I am happy to say that I will be using it a lot on our next essay
Sometimes its important to repeat some key words in different forms. The book uses the example (hike, hiker, hiking). You also need to be consistent. You don't want to change the point of the view from one to another or the verb tense from something other then your draft used. Using transitions helps readers move from sentence to sentence (using worlds like for example, next, thirdly, etc.).
Once your paper is finished you should go through and adjust your paragraph length. Make sure they aren't too long or too short. Paragraphs that are too long can make the reader get lost and lose interest in the writing.
When writing my papers, once thing I never do it go back and adjust my paragraph lengths. I usually just keep them the way they are and add more if it needs to be a certain page length but otherwise I don't usually mess with it. I think after reading chapter 4, I will start going back and adjusting my paragraphs to make sure they are just right and where they need to be. I also have a hard time including examples and experiences in my work sometimes. I either forget, or just can't think of something to use and so even when it was required to include those, I would usually just leave them out which resulting in a lower grade. Chapter 4 has a lot of great information and I am happy to say that I will be using it a lot on our next essay
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